He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize
