It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
