Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
