Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
