12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Randomize
