If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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