You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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