Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
