Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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