Just mADE A PArabola og urine
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
