Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
