I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Randomize
