five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
