Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
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