does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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