I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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