i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
