it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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