do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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