Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
