# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
