Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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