He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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