just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
