she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
