I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize