Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
