Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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