Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
