you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
birth control should be required to get into college
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Randomize
