one two three fourrrrnication!
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
