the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
