Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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