i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
