Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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