SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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