it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
