I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
