Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
