Have you finally orgasmed yet?
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
