Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
