Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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