Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Randomize
