i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
