Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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