my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize