fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
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