): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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