it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
