It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
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They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
